I wrote this at a conference for writers. It is a fictional conversation at bath time. Enjoy!

Five minutes to bath time!

I hate bath time.

We have to go to bed.

No, we don’t.

Just get in the tub.

I need toys first.

What toys?

Ginger and Mermaid.

Good grief.

Here they are.

Big girls take baths …

Little girls have fun.

… without toys.

Who cares?

I’m a big girl.

So am I.

Prove it.

I dress myself.

So what?

Feed myself.

Big deal!

Help Mommy.

So do I!

Do chores.

Hate those.

Can read.


Can write.


Jump rope.


Can, too.



I double-dutch.

No, you can’t. Hel-loooo?

Look, can we just take a bath without toys just this one time?

You are so boring. Just sit back there all by yourself while I play with Ginger and Mermaid.

I hate you and your toys.

What’s wrong with toys?

They’re for little girls.

They’re for big girls.

You’re a little girl!

You aren’t the boss of me.

I’m older than you.


I’m boss.