Wannabeathlete, a newlywed, writes about the questions she and her husband tackle. I am glad the author, who doesn’t usually write about race on her blog, penned this essay. It has one of the best comeback lines I’ve read for those times when strangers ask ignorant questions. Full Disclosure: I used to be her husband’s college professor. (Yes, writing that sentence just made me feel very old.) Enjoy.
People always wonder how being a mixed race couple impacts our lives. I’m happy to say that the impact is negligible – at least in my opinion. But there are a few zingers that stick out in my mind.
1. “Together or Separate?”
This bothers me to no end. Far too often when we go out to eat, we get this question when the waiter/cashier gives us our bill. HELLO. We are MARRIED. Is that so hard to believe? Now, I have been a server and I understand that this is sometimes hard to distinguish – it could be a client, a co-worker, etc. But there are some times that the question seems unwarranted. Very unwarranted in my opinion. Drives me crazy. Maybe I’m overreacting. My husband thinks I am. Oh well.
2. Our Godson
We are so lucky to have this little boy in our life. But bringing him places often raises eyebrows. People often look at me with disdain, and their look says, ‘So you got knocked up by some white guy and now this guy is taking care of your kid. Tsk tsk.” Or they see my husband running after this cute little white boy and freak out. It’s okay. He’s with us. I think it is so precious how our godson has attached himself to my husband. He calls him “Uncle Nate” and the two are inseparable. Our godson even had my husband come to his school recently for their “Father’s Day Breakfast”. Cutest thing ever.
3. “Is He Yours?”
We are not the only mixed race marriage in the family. Nate’s brother and sister-in-law are mixed as well. And they have a precious little boy. Isn’t he the cutest?
I was talking with my sister-in-law today about the blog I found and she told me about an incident she had in Target:
Just like the lady in target who asked if Malachi was mine.
I said, “He is now, I found him back there in the toys.”
This made me laugh so hard. I think the bottom line is usually ignorance – not malice. Did you know that 1 in 7 marriages are now interracial? Even though he identifies as black, the president of our country is the product of an interracial relationship. The world is changing. Slowly. But it is changing.
Is your marriage interracial? Do you have any stories to share on this topic?
Do you have a story to tell? Send it to Honeysmoke@Honeysmoke.com